Masked Charade
by Inuki Ookami
Summary: Seto x Jou Shounen-ai sort of yaoi... Seto and Jou have become good friends. Seto likes guys, and is a total player- but all he's ever really wanted is Jou. Can he ever possibly worked up the courage to tell the blonde?
1. Part 1

**Masked Charade**

**Published:** 21st June 2003   
**Pairings:** Seto x Joey  
**Disclaimers: **Jou and Seto are not mine. The hooker is TRI-Link's.  
**Summary:** Jou and Seto are friends- Seto likes guys, and is a real player. But all he's ever wanted was Jou. Can he ever work up the courage to tell the truth?  
  
**[Story Notes]: **Let me see.This story only makes sense if you take on the OoC pretense that Seto and Jou are very good friends somehow, and that everyone knows that Seto likes guys- and that he is a really big player and dates tons constantly.**  
  
[Author's Notes]:** I wrote this at like... 5:00 AM last night after getting a major rush of inspiration. I don't expect many people to like this- because the style in which I wrote it is neither poetry nor story. It's more of a "prose" style, or so I call it. It's what I write when I'm trying to get a powerful message across- and keep it sort of raw. I don't want to fluster it over with too many pretty words, or make it too short- though I don't want it to drag on forever either. Sort of like snapshots- or moments in time, I guess. I'm posting this because I like it. A lot. Not because I think anyone else might. Please understand that before reading.  


  
  
I am the wind. I exist alone. But why? For what purpose is this lonely existance?

It's all a Masked Charade, and the people are but mere dancers before me again. Moving to that solitary tune. Dancing the slow and steady beat. The rhythmn of life at their heels, snapping and clicking- but they give me no rest.

The lanterns are a glow behind me and above me, shattering my dreams. Spiralling contagiously, like a party twirler, knocked out of place.

And once more my heart knots.  
It's a double knot this time.  
Why?

. . .

Why not?

I know I can probably stare up into the open skies forever. I know that they will always invite me in. Just like the men. Just like the men. They always invite me in. Casually or eagerly. I take them as they go. I've had every single one of them. I've known every single one of them. I still remember every single one of them. Tall or average, thin or muscular, they've all laid beside me... or under me as the case may be.

And yet I'm always alone.

This existance that I've known has been full of so very many things. And yet- now it all seems so bland to me. It's all so very pointless. I had gotten to the point where I could dispose of one trick that night, and pick up another cute boy the next morning. It was like I was... magnetic.

Though there was always one I could never attract.

  
-

"It's always the blondes, huh?" She was a swanky one, alright. Long brown hair and passionate blue eyes I could almost see myself reflected in. She wore an outfit that looked like it belonged at some rerun of an old French documentary about le Moulin Rouge. Blue petal shapes danced across her wild outfit, and she seemed like a misfit in the well-dressed party held within. Men in suits, women in simple, yet beautiful outfits. And there she was, looking like the skank from across town- trying to pick up guys for a couple of bucks like it was a hobby.

Well, what the hell did she know anyway?

"What's it to ya?" I asked. Maybe the whore was afraid I was goin' to intervene on her territory.

  
Or maybe she was wondering if I'd be her next client.  
Who knew with this one...

  
"Nothin'. I used to date... when I was younger too." She said, pulling out a cigarette and putting it to her lips. She fumbled for a second, then gave me an inquiring look.

"Got a light?"

  
I held the lighter up to meet her cigarette.

"Did you love any of them?" I asked curiously as I snapped it closed... or maybe I was just trying to pass the time, until yet another brainless hottie passed by. Another one for me to pick up... to toy with... to use.

God. Was I just as bad as her?

  
"Nope." She said, matter of factly, taking a puff on the white stick. 

But the gaze in her eyes told me otherwise.

"Except... once." She said awkwardly, staring up at the crescent moon, a dream in her eyes.

"But it would never have worked out." She said icily, in a cool tone- snapping back to reality. Her eyes were faded again, but for that brief moment they had sparkled with a light I hadn't seen before.

  
"What about that one?" She nodded her head toward someone inside.

The boy I had come with.

Jou.

  
I tried not to laugh.  
I swear I did.

How could I have never seen it before?

Oh, I had. Yes. I definitely had.  
I just didn't have it in my mind... that he'd be... ya know.

I couldn't fuck him and leave him like all the rest. And I was... too afraid. Too afraid it might turn into something more. Too afraid it might become something serious. Too afraid to face the truth. That I might be in love. That I might actually LOVE him. Love him like I had never loved anyone before.

And there he was, as handsome as ever. His blonde hair, falling down infront of his face- the lights caressing his cheeks- the shimmer running across his smile as he danced.

How could I have never seen it before?

Oh, I had. Yes. Of course I had.

And here was... some... ordinary slut- pointing it out.

As if it should be obvious.  
As if she were a matchmaker.  
As if it would be perfect.

And maybe I was afraid that it would be.

  
"Who?... Him?" I laughed. Trying to hide all those feelings deeper inside of me, as the knots inside my heart tightened, and I tried to keep from crying or laughing- which ever would come first.

"Yeah? What's so wrong with that one? Just another pretty face, eh?" She said crudely, nuding me in the shoulder to emphasize the last word.

She leaned back against the railing as another waft of smoke puffed out of her mouth.

Yeah.

Just another pretty face.  
Sure thing.

  
-

"Come on, Seto. Let's dance." Jou smiled at me. Flashing that look that would have made... just about anybody else faint. He sure was getting his fair share of looks. Strike that. Everyone was looking at him. Even if they weren't attracted to him.

But how could you not be?

I shook my head. I didn't want to dance.

I needed to think some more.

I could have any of them I wanted. My pick of the litter.

Only... I'd had them all.

I'd had more than enough. I was tired. Weary. It wasn't that I wanted to settle down- Oh, no. Not that. It was that.. it was that I was so afraid. So afraid that it might be too perfect. And then something might go wrong. Or too afraid that he'd just laugh it off as though it were a joke. Too afraid that he might take me seriously, and refuse. Too afraid.

God. We were like brothers... that'd practically be incest, wouldn't it?

Shit. I knew it was time to stop making excuses for myself.

  
I turned and fled.  
I didn't even care anymore.  
I didn't care if he followed.

-

It had been a long time since I had walked these lonely streets.

Their cobblestone lining was wearing away, like old news. Because that's what life was becoming. Old and tiring. Mostly just boring. I need something fresh. Something new. Change. Difference. Or maybe I just needed to rediscover the old... bring it alive again. Just like the whore... my eyes were stale and dry with sights and aging..

It wasn't even like I was *that* old. Not even close to middle-age... hell no.  
Yet... I felt like it.

And he was there- right behind me. A worried look on his face that I could see- but knew from the expression in his voice.

"Kaiba!"

He called my name.  
He said it.

He called it down the street at my retreating figure. Slumped with shame and sorrow.

  
I could have had any of them. I had already had every one of them. When I went into the clubs- I knew them all by face, but never by name.

Never by name.

I had a terrible memory, or so I'd led myself to believe. When I reality it was because I was going through more than I could handle. One for each day of the week- month- year... It was a menagerie of calendar toys. Mapped out perfectly so that they were all mine.

And I didn't want any of them.

because I only wanted him

but I was too fucking afraid.

I called him a coward.  
But I was the coward.

  
"SETO!" It spun through my mind as he ran up to me.

And he was there- I could hear his ragged breath against my back. I could feel the tears gathering in my eyes. I could hear my heart beating a hundred miles a minute. My throat dried up.

  
"What's wrong?" A comforting arm around my shoulder. Because we were friends... Yeah. Just friends.

And I looked up at him- the tears in my eyes.  
And suddenly nothing mattered anymore, because he had his arms around me.

And the world was perfect.

Like it had never been before.

-

He led me by my hand to the bed. Taking off clothing piece by piece, and I, in an orderly fashion did likewise- almost a mirror image.

"You know, he said you've been to bed with everyone except me." He said softly.  
"Yeah, well... guess he was right." I muttered. Trying to dismiss it. Was Joey making a joke? Or was the blonde.. hinting at something? No. My mind was at play again- fooling me. Twisting words.

"He said the day you went to bed with me would be the day you died." He said again. Almost laughing.

"Would you just... just shut-up?" I replied, feeling the tears returning.

"What's wrong? What happened?" He sounded sad for me.

  
How could I tell him? How could I say to him that I loved him? That I could have- had had every guy I had ever desired and more. How could I tell him that night after night, day after day, when I needed a friend... when something went awry... when I was finished with one date, and on to the next "boyfriend", there he was? Like a lost puppy, waiting for me, when I was free. Those big, mournful brown eyes, staring deep into my soul. Waiting...

But I never came around.

Because I couldn't.  
Because it made me cry when I lay alone-  
After the next guy was gone, and before the new one would come...

And I wondered what the meaning was-  
What the purpose was.

  
I laid down on the bed curled up against myself. Jou laid as far away from me as possible.

Was I really that... gross?

  
Maybe I was.

A pale blue light cascaded down from the thin curtains- caused by the silver rays of moonlight from that same crescent moon.

-

The next day it was the same routine.

But I didn't even have to try.

He came up to me- not like I ever really approached them.

Gave me that look.  
That look that says "I want you."  
That look that says "I need you."

I didn't even respond.  
It didn't matter though.

Somehow that was taken as acceptance.  
I'd have called it rape- if I had tried to struggle.

But the struggle was silent and inward.

I don't even remember the sex- if there was any.

No. Of course there was. There always was.

At any rate- I don't remember it.

-

That night when I walked away from another party Jou followed me out into the empty- silent street again.

"Okay, what the hell is wrong with you?" He asked stubbornly. It never was like him to give up.

Immediately I bursted into tears.  
I couldn't hold them back any longer.

it had been years.

Years of seeing red lights shimmer and fade  
Years of one boy after another... young and old  
New and used...

"You would never understand." I managed.

"I can try." He said firmly. Comfortingly.

  
"How can I tell you..." I began

"That every time I look at another guy... I only see you? That every time I kiss another man- it's you I'm kissing. When I'm with anyone else, I only want to really be with you. How can I tell you that I can never work up the courage? Time and time again. How can I tell you that my heart feels like it's on fire when I'm around you- but when you're gone I want to die? What words should I use to compose the symphony that would convey my emotions properly? What instrument do you expect from me? How can I explain the long years I've spent- looking at you from behind? Sneaking secret glances? Being so envious of how you can be so carefree? How jealous I am when you find someone... the longing I feel when I lie awake some nights... staring at the stars. When I go from one guy to the next- always seeing you, but never being able to have you? How can I explain how long it has been since I have last been able to look you in the eyes, and tell you anything honestly? How can I not feel guilty when I see your expression when I've used another guy, and been dissatisfied- because they can't possibly meet my expectations- because they're not you? How can I tell you that I want you more than anything in the world? That I love you more than anything in the world? That these streets we stand on are nothing more than vehicles for my transportation? Because I know by tomorrow I'll just find and fuck another guy. That I'll use him- like no one should. Because I know I can never have you. Because I know you can never be mine. Because I know "we're just friends". Because I'm sick and tired of the lies, and of the hatred. The jealousy- and the pain. And most of all... I'm fucking tired of the way I feel around you. In how many words do you want me to say good-bye? Which I can never do- because I can't bear not to see you ever again- but I am torn between, because I know that I must- or I will never be able to let go. Because I can't let go of you. Because I have to hold on for dear life... because it feels so right when I'm standing close to you... when we touch it's like magic. I want nothing more than you. The money- the suits- the car... it's all shit. Useless. Utterly worthless- if I can't have you. If you won't ever love me back. If you won't just tell me what you're fucking feeling. If you won't return my nervous glance. If you won't take my advanced seriously. If you won't look past all those other boys. Because all I've ever wanted was you. I need you to live... I need you to stay alive. You're all I've ever known- all I ever want to know as long as I live... All I've ever wanted and dreamed of... and more. But I sit there day in and day out, realizing that I can never have you. Realizing it is all some stupid fantasy. Realizing that none of this means anything, because we're all just going to die and I'll never even know what it was like to be close to you. Because I know I'll never forget you- no matter how far away I travel, and how hard I try. I know that you will always be there- haunting my memories, invading my dreams. Turning them into fiendish nightmares in which I can do nothing more than fantasize about... you. My best friend. God. How the hell did this happen? What have you done to me? What did you do to make me this way? Why did you have to curse me like this? So that I sit there every day mourning the fact that I can never have you- and you've made that so painfully obvious without ever even speaking about it... _Because I love you Jou._ I fucking love you. Like I've never loved anyone before. And I'm scared and afraid- of that love." I sobbed.

  
".... K- Kaiba?" He whimpered quietly. Shocked.

"Shut-up Jou." I said- hanging my head.

I felt a hand raising my chin so that we met eye to eye...

_And he kissed me on the lips._

-


	2. Part 2

**Masked Charade**

**Published:** 14th September 2003   
**Pairings:** Seto x Joey  
**Disclaimers: **Jou and Seto are not mine (unfortunately), if they were they'd be the main characters of Yu-Gi-Oh and make out constantly. ^_^;;  
**Summary:** Jou and Seto are friends- Seto likes guys, and is a real player. But all he's ever wanted was Jou. Can he ever work up the courage to tell the truth?  
  
**[Story Notes]: **Let me see.This story only makes sense if you take on the OoC pretense that Seto and Jou are very good friends somehow, and that everyone knows that Seto likes guys- and that he is a really big player and dates tons constantly.**  
  
[Author's Notes]:** I finished writing this one just now. It's been a long time... since I updated ANY of my fanfiction. -_-;; Jantra and I have kind of been out of Contact.. and I sort of.. um.. hate High in Calcium (hence it hasn't been updated in forever), but I still kinda like this one. So this is the one that gets updated! Mu'whaha. I might write more if I get requests for it... but right now I'm happy with having 2 chapters, each the other character's P.O.V. *Sigh* I'm so sorry for such a long time without updating any of my fanfiction. I guess I have no fan-base now. LoL And this fanfiction... well, mind my excuses, but this chapter sucks a lot more than the last one. I was so uninspired- it's basically just a copy of the last chapter from a different point of view. While it was a nice exercise for me to write, it'll probably be a boring read for you guys. Sorry. -_-;; I apologize ahead of time. But for anyone who DOES still like this, and me (Yay! ^_^ ) Then go ahead n' tell me! I know.. this chapter does need work. But I'm too lazy to fix it. Hahaha! ^^;; Well, enjoy.  


  
  
  
They call it backtracking.  
Going backward through every step- trying to find clues to hint at how thing became they way they are.

I don't call it backtracking. I call it remembering. How we became friends. How he finally admitted things to me he had never admitted to anyone before. I even wondered if he was telling me for a real reason. Wondering if he was hinting at there being an "us". But it never seemed that it was really possible outside of my dreams.

Still the mechanics went on. Still the reports came in from him. About every guy he had used. It almost made me sick. They way he took them and left them. The way he used them-

but the truth was I was just jealous.

  
There I was, become a bit of a goody-two-shoes, if ya know what I mean. I was all pure and and innocent. Still just looking for that special someone- wondering all along if it was him. Hoping he would come around- but he never did.

It was about a year or so when I realized there was no point in saving myself for him. He had to have had a good hundred or more guys by then.

There was no purpose in waiting. It was better just to move on.

I found my tastes were picky. Always comparing someone to him-... if they didn't style their hair as well as his, or smell as nice as he did- I had some limits, of course. 

  
I knew nobody could ever match up to him. I didn't care about his money or his cars or his mansion or his servants or his fancy clothes or his limos or his company or his duel monsters or his arenas or his tournaments or his blue eyes white dragons or his dueling abilities or his expensive food or his metal brief case or his expensive shoes or his perfect hair cut.

I just wanted someone nice. That would appreciate me.  
That seemed to be one of the things Kaiba never seemed to have.  
He was such a jerk- even after we became sort-of-friends.

Even after we had matured out of our habits of being rivals.  
Even after we had left highschool to move on a year or two later.

Things were always the same.  
He was insensitive to the people that fell in love with him.  
They dropped like flies.

But he didn't care.

It's good that I didn't let him hear my buzz.

  
-

  
I sit there waiting for him.

tap, tap, tap

Gently knocking my foot on the floor. Where is he? Why hasn't he shown up yet? Wasn't he supposed to come by and pick me up?

tap, tap, tap

My foot is on the hard wood floor again. These are my nice shoes. My dress shoes. I don't wear them unless it's a special occasion. Well, it's sort of a special occasion.

tap, tap, tap

No it's not. It's not a special occasion at all. I'm kidding myself- making this into more than what it really is. It's not supposed to be anything special. We're going out so he can MEET other people, like we do every weekend. We're doing the same old thing so he can go pick up anothe guy and use him.

tap, tap, tap

And I'm going out to dance a little, and then get totally plastered and sulk in a corner by myself about how I'll never have him- even though I've tried to forget him so many times.

because it'll never happen.

tap, tap, tap

Why do I kid myself like this? We're not going on a date. By the end of the night, he'll just have another one. Another one to use. Another one to get rid of the next day- and probably never see again.

That smooth-talking jerk.

tap, tap, tap

my foot is waiting. Longing. I need to be out on that dance floor again. Be free again. Somehow I had picked up dancing during my last years of highschool... it had taken a lot of practice- me being a total idiot with my feet, and all. But now that I could do it perfectly, pulling of stunts I never would have thought possible, I felt free. Truly free when I danced... besides, it was fun.

tap, tap, tap

Speaking of things that are fun. This wasn't. I didn't want to stay there... waiting for him to come. Like it was Prom Night or something. Like he'd come to the door wearing a tuxedo, holding flowers for me, then my parents would come running down those always silent stairs and my little sister would smile and wave goodbye as Kaiba escorted me out the door in his limo.

What a joke that was.  
What a dreamer I was...

tap, tap, tap

Okay. So here's the plan. I go find someone nice... don't try too hard... but maybe, just maybe I'll find someone...

The last couple of people I ended up dating were a mixed bag. Some were nice, some were jerks. But overall I picked them because I liked them- even though none of them could match up... to him.

tap, tap, tap

Where IS he?! Isn't he late? What's going on? What's keeping him so long?

tap, tap, tap

God! Why do I care so much? It feels like my heart is going to burst...

tap, tap, t-

  
It's a knocking on the door!  
That must be him!

I get up and almost run to the door- then remind myself. Must... remain... calm.

I *try* to saunter over to the door as best as I can without tripping over things... or myself.   
(but it's more of a nervous stride).

I reach the door and open it.

And nearly faint.  
- or maybe I did but wasn't aware of my fainting

  
There he stands, in all his glory. Looking as handsome as ever. Looking hansomer than as handsome as ever. With looks that could kill. And if only he knew he was killing me right now. Damn, I can more than see what all those guys see in him... but... I've retained my jealousy. Thrown it into a little far-away place at the back of my mind for storage.

  
And then I realize. This is my stumbling block. This is why things never work out in any of my relationships. No matter how hard I try- I realize, it is only a diversion, to try and keep my mind away from HIM. Because he's the one I want... but it's useless to try.

So here I go again. Another night where I try and find someone new to meet with, almost fall in love with- but not quite (because they're just not Kaiba), and then have a lasting, meaningful relationship with for, Oh, I don't know... three months? Maybe four? Then we break it off because things die out.

  
because they say i seem "distracted"  
because they see me looking around them instead of at them  
because every time Kaiba walks by they become unimportant  
because every time he walks by, HE is all I see  
because i can't concentrate when he's in the room  
because he's got this magnetic thing on me.. and there's nothing i can do to free myself

But I have to for the moment. Gotta pull myself away from getting too close to him. To kissing him- or trying to. To... doing anything.

Dammit. It was better when we were enemies. Then at least I could be physically close to him, but not always hanging around with him, feeling tortured every time he was near.

Instead I was stuck with there being basically zero chance of anything between him and me beyond friendship.

Now I was stuck with being his lackey.

I had nothing to do other than to hang out with him, and listen to stories about all the guys he "had" yesterday.

And he didn't even seem to care about them- it was so casual.

I think he knew he was the guy everyone wanted to be.. that they admired.  
He was they guy that everyone wanted to be WITH.

And he played it up as much as he could.  
the bastard. Charming everyone in sight...

like it was easy.

  
-

Wild lights. Beating. Flashing. The beat picks up. I'm sweeping across the chaotic dance floor. I'm up on my toes, and down the next second. The crowd surrounds me haphazardly. The music continues- with no end in sight. Going on and on and on. A definite beat is there. And I'm twirling, spinning, flipping, doing everything I can possibly contort my body into under my command. My clothing feels like it is clinging onto my body for dear life as I pull off some more insane moves and the crowd around me sways to the ominous music that looms over the dance floor. It smells of sweat and alcohol, but I don't care. It's certainly the intoxicating mix, and it only drives me on more. The warmth of the crowd generates more energy for me...

And then it's all over.

As the music finishes, and slows to a stop.

I see Kaiba slip in through the doorway. Several heads turn, but he pretends he doesn't even notice. Like usual. Always playing the cool one, eh? He always had everyone staring at him... and always made it look as though he were immune to it. He ignored those looks as though they weren't looking at him at all.

  
// He approached me, his feet touching the ground.  
As he walked toward me I could see his hair moving slightly, almost floating, with his walk.  
His clothing rustled behind him, leaving a trail that reminded me of a magnificent dragon's tail.  
Those eyes of his were as cool and icy blue as ever. //  
And his chin and his ears and his nose and his... it's all perfect.  
No wonder. He's Seto kaiba.  
It's hard to forget that, when one is standing in front of him. He's really hard to miss, I guess.

Especially since everyone is usually staring at him. Just like they are now...

// "Come on, Seto, Let's dance." I smiled at him softly. He paused, then shook his brown locks slowly. I guess he just didn't want to dance... maybe he was too good for it... too good for me. Just like everything else. Like everyone else. Who he took then left.

Maybe he feared if he took me he'd leave me too just like all the rest.  
Or maybe the thought just never entered his head.. that I could be attractive.

"No!" I wanted to shout, "I too can be attractive! There is no reason you can't go out with me! Look! See how I have always longed to be with you. Can't you tell the way my heart breaks when you go off with some other guy? Can you not see that look of cultured longing in my eyes after all these years? Or the jealousy that reaps my soul when you tell tales of your previous dates?" But I stay silent.

[ For a brief second I could almost see a look cross over his face that rare appeared. He looked... almost sad. ]

Then he spun on his heels and ran straight out the other way.  
. . . Like a frightened puppy dog.

-

Once or twice I skidded and slipped on the crumbling path; once or twice I nearly fell.  
Once or twice I picked myself up.  
Once or twice- no... more I felt my heart burst.

"Kaiba!" I cried.

he didn't even respond  
didn't even turn around  
wouldn't even give me  
the time of day just like  
always.

so why did I keep following?  
why did I keep chasing a dream?

"SETO!" I released a strangled breath and with a final effort ran up to the other boy.

His hair hung down over his face so that I could barely see it, but under all that I knew he was holding back the tears in his eyes. His fists were clenched, and he might have been biting his lip- but I couldn't be sure.

"What's wrong?" I whimpered. Kaiba was the strong one of the two of us- always there with a brave word, a stern and reassuring look- now he was the weak one. I had to help him in a time of need. I slid an arm around my friend's shoulder hoping to calm him.

his noble chin raised-  
his head followed  
and those perfect lips  
and the proud nose  
and even those reluctant eyes followed- sombre and sober at last. Tears quelling their depths, sweltering with intense emotion.

and I did what felt right.  
I pulled him into a tight embrace, and began to cry as well.

-

That night things only got worse.  
or better.  
Or maybe it was worse.  
Yes. They got worse.

I am sure of it.

when we slept he made sure to stay far away from  
as far away from  
very far away from  
me as possible  
because

I don't know. But it was rather depressing for me and as the moonlight bathed us with it's hinderance flittering down through soft curtains I was at peace and wished I could be forever with him like this. Like that. Like then. Like now. Like always.

-

But tomorrow (which was today, and that day- the one I mean is evident...)

everything was the same as it had been before-  
everything was exactly the same.  
He went back to his usual "player" routine... and I went back to being the good boy that never did anything wrong.

Some random fool that was just another toy for him.  
Like he was the cat- and the poor human being before him exited so he could bat at it with a lazy paw as it dangled above him...

and I knew he had sex with that boy.  
but I couldn't bare to hear another glorious  
'victoy' story from him about how he'd  
taken another one.

maybe this one was a virgin. Or maybe he was just really good in bed.  
Or maybe, just maybe, he was "the one"- though that seemed laughable  
since the "great and powerful Seto Kaiba" had so many so far...  
then again, it seemed perfectly plausible that eventually "the one" could  
come along, and the more guys he "had" the closer he was getting to  
finding out. Right?

wrong.

The whole idea - train of thought - train of thinking - it utterly repulsed me.  
And I wanted to get as far away from him and that room as I could.

-

I went for a walk that day, out in the bright sun. The building behind me was made of grey rounded bricks, very European, with some very elegant flowers on the walk-way, and some solemn poppies on display. A few glossy trees shaded over part of the area, giving a nice texture to the pathway. It seemed very trenched in time, yet so... pure. Like all of it's troubles were long over...

when would mine be?

-

it was another party that he turned  
and fled from. I don't understand him.  
Everything was left staring- startled.  
As was I.

What was so wrong with him? I had only gone over to talk with him at a brief intermission..  
And he fled.

What was wrong with me now?! He didn't want to be seen in public with me anymore?  
Was he afraid people might think we were dating, and he'd never get any guys that way?  
Was he afraid people disliked me and if they found out that he and I were friends they wouldn't date him?  
Was that the problem?  
What WAS the problem?!

I had to find out.  
I couldn't just... sit there and watch him run out into the night.. so alone.

"Okay, what the hell is wrong with you?" I questioned.

This time he couldn't cover his tears with his hair.  
I knew they were there- and I could see them-  
As silvery beads flew down his face with gossamer wings like dew-drenched cobwebs  
looping across his face like the self-same broken sniffles accompanying those tears.

"You'd never understand." he mumbled through his choked sobs.

I put a firm hand on his arm.

"I can try." I stated simply. If he wasn't even going to give me a chance, there was no point.  
What the hell did he mean by saying that I'd never understand? How long had I been his friend for?

Long enough to be able to *understand*, anyway.

And he burst into a huge sobbing speech- that was so beautiful that I wanted to never forget it.  
I wanted to swallow those words and keep them inside of me forever...  
Because they were so... overwhelming.

He was telling me.. That he loved me.  
That he loved me more than anyone.  
And it was so powerful I can't even *begin* to put that emotion into words. I can't even try. Because feeble words will never be able to express something wrought so deeply within our souls.

"K.. Kaiba..." I managed to stutter.

He told me to be quiet, and hung his head in a dejected manner, but I lifted his head...  
To confirm the feeling- as he could see those very same tears in my eyes...  
Because I knew they were welling up as well.  
because I knew that I couldn't keep all that emotion inside of me...  
Not any longer.  
Not any longer.  
Not... any... longer.

As always, he was the brave one.  
he told me how he felt.

And drew him into a kiss, those tears still smudging out my vision partially, gradually more and more...  
Until I could not see at all... 

But it didn't matter as his warm lips met mine...  
As our breaths meshed into one.

because...

because he loved me BACK.  
Because it wasn't unrequited.  
Because I wouldn't be alone forever...  
And I knew I'd always have him.   



End file.
